I'm In A Metal Mood

Doggie sitting has its priviledges, except when the doggies get up to play in the middle of the night. I'm in one of those, 2 hours behind and irritated beyond repair moods.

I've been listening to different stations (classical, soft rock, lyrical, indie pop) and none of them have been able to change my mindset. So, now... I'm listening to metal.

People become suprised when I mention bands that I like sometimes. I did grow up with a big brother. He likes metal more than I do, but I like my fair share. Here's a perfect example of one time that someone was suprised.

I met a guy through a friend of mine who I crushed on for a long time. He was my 'type' ... meaning he had a good job that he liked but also had a bad attitude and self esteem issues which meant that at the end of our 'relationship' he told me how amazing I was and that I deserved better than him. (Insert comment about how I just wanted to hang out not get married... sheesh.) The first time we hung out, we were driving to my house in his car (Old style convertible) and he goes "You don't mind a little metal do you (totally trying to be cool) and I said like who? He says Slipknot or Disturbed (which I categorize as hard rock not metal) or something and I was like "Oh, yeah, I like them." and he sort of rolled his eyes and said "suuuure you do." I felt like giving him the finger, but at this point I had yet to stand up to a dumbass guy like that....so I kept the finger to myself.

But, I digress. I'm in a metal mood today. I'd really like some Helmet. I'll settle for the AC/DC that this internet radio station terms as metal.

Speaking of good metal check out The Valley they rock.

Favorite lyrics of the day

These (partial) lyrics go to a song that I can't get my headphones to go loud enough when I'm listening to it:

I was called amazing
I make people believe
With nothin' in my pockets
And nothin' up my sleeve.

~Theme of the month. I'm amazing. I'm fabulous. I'm so cool. People tell me this as they break things off with me. I deserve everything that they can't give me.


damn right.

I LOVE when Seattle is in the National News

Karaoke Attack

This is a story from the Houston Chronicle. It is so bizarre that I've seen it in a few different papers from around the states. Lovely.

Insomnia

I've been up since 2:30 am. I was going to blog a bit about some intellectual early morning thoughts, but my day took a different turn around 7am. Right after I took this picture on my phone:
Seattle Skyline Sunrise

I decided to take the water taxi over to work this morning because traffic was already beginning to be a headache and since I'm sleep deprived I can only imagine what my temper is going to do today. Good thing I get to wear headphones at my desk and not interact all day.

I didn't really feel like getting ready (aka, doing my hair) so I just left it wet in the hopes that it will dry to a nice wavy mess by noon.

Too bad a camera crew was at the water taxi this morning covering the story. And since I was a newby, they decided to interview me.

I really hope its not my 15 seconds of fame, cause that would be so lame. And so my luck. But, for those of you that read this everyday that are in the Seattle area, channel 7. They even took my name down. Great. No annonimity either. For those of you lucky enough to catch a glimpse of it, you might not recognize me... because I don't look like myself, except for the Starbucks cup attached to my right hand. :)

Funniest Question Asked Today

You don't play D&D do you?

As in Dungeons and Dragons.

Answer: No. My mom wouldn't let us, she didn't appreciate it.

Response: Oh, but you would have if she didn't mind?

Answer: Uhh. I guess?

Response: Great, cause there is a whole drawer of stuff right here!

Just Kidding!

I wrote a post earlier this month about how happily blissful I was because I found this guy I liked. Well, JUST KIDDING! He turned out to be a jerk as well. Why? you might ask, well he left me at a bar with his friends while he went out to talk to some girl for awhile. Not sure how long I was there, but what I should have done was left the minute he said "I'll be right back."

I'm thinking about putting him on dontdatehimgirl.com. Then again, why waste the energy. Its just really hard work getting through all the jerks out there. But, this weekend I found about 6 or 7 of them for you ladies that don't need to go out with them yourselves!

Any guy who hangs around with people who think its ok to be hanging out with cheaters, or that try to make excuses for the reason his buddy (who happens to be your date) is out talking to some hysterical girl when he should be worried about the girl who's about to do some damage to his car. If I could only remember where he parked it. Sigh.

Movin on. I feel a road trip comin on.

The Fruitcake Lady

Fruitcake Lady - The most amazing home videos are here

I'm in trouble.

My new job has video games in the back room.

What's the problem, you might ask?

They have Guitar Hero... and apparently there are competitions with prizes.

DUDE! Check this out...

Deluxe Ball Chair


Its a little weird, but interesting to say the least. I sit on a normal ball at work, and people make fun of me.

The Most "Techie" Thing I've Done All Week

My new job at the start up company is AWESOME. Except for the fact that I have to take a test in three months...sheesh!

The most 'techie' thing I did this week was install a second monitor. I've never done this before. I know how to plug in a monitor, but that's about it. And the funniest thing is when the guy brought over my second monitor I asked him "So, should I move...or..." and he looks at me with a smirk and says:

"We like to let everyone empower themselves." and walks away.

So, I only locked myself out of my computer once, but I got that monitor up and running and can now move all my windows from one to the other!

The learning curve here is steep, but I plan on stomping it flat pretty soon.

Dating 101?

For clarification on an earlier post; I am right back where I should be with dating. It makes no sense, men really don't make sense, and maybe I should have stuck to my 'giving up on men', who knows.

When I was younger (you know, in my 20's) I came up with these strange superstitions. I wouldn't date anyone with the same color eyes as mine (it wouldn't last), wouldn't write about that person in my journal (the next day things would go horribly awry), wouldn't date a guy who's pants were smaller than mine (which lets face it -- that's just cruel), wouldn't date someone who was younger than me (too immature)... the list was pretty long.

I threw all those out the window, and now I'm thinking maybe I was on to something. I've finally started dating people who are interested in me, but I revert to old habits. Like, when I'm excited about them, I don't hide it. I don't play "the game." I was never good at it anyway. I don't filter everything I say just in case some "we" slips out, or future tense of an action... god forbid. Does this freak them out? Not sure, but the old faithful response is... if they freak out now, what are they going to do when they really know you?

So, are these superstitions something I should keep? Should I play the game, and if I do, for how long? If I really do like someone do I pretend I don't? Someone puleeeeeeeease tell me the answer!

Porn for Women

The night I swore off men.

I swore off men at around 10:00 on Thursday June 28th.

At around 11:00 Daldon* walks through the front door. Daldon and I have a small history. Here it is:

Between 24 and 27 I had my midlife crisis. Didn't know where I was supposed to be going or what I was supposed to be doing or who I was supposed to be with. But, I can tell you who I WASN'T supposed to be with, and those were the people I was hanging out with at the time.

They were always referred to as 'the dudes.' A buch of guys I met through a co-worker who ended up moving down the block from me. My roommate at the time made it very hard for me to distance myself from these guys since she didn't want to distance herself from them.

Long story short: I was involved with one of them. It was horrible. My self esteem was in the gutter telling me I should be happy someone was even paying attention to me, while my brain was screaming at me to get out while I still had a chance... then there was the birthday party that was thrown for me (it was actually just an excuse for those guys to have a party and coincided with my 27th birthday, so we all just said it was for me.) One of the girls that hung around brought a friend of hers who I remember taking an interest in because he was good looking. But, since I was 'involved' with one of the guys and there was all kinds of drama surrounding the situation and my brain and self esteem were duking it out to see which had the bigger cohones...well. I was pretty much a mess.

I remember running into him when we were out drinking (something that was fueling the self esteem from the gutter) and thinking "it would be really nice if I could just chill with this guy." But that was just not going to happen because of the circumstances: friends in the way, guys in the way, insecurities abounding.

The last thing I remember about Doland was the night we met up for trivia. This was probably the second or third time we'd hung out, but I always kept my distance. I guess I was feeling out the 'vibe' so to speak. As he was walking me out to my car I kept thinking to myself 'this is where he kisses me.' but I couldn't figure out if I wanted that to happen or not, and at the time he would have had to go the whole 100% instead of the 90/10% ratio. So. It didn't happen.

Shortly after this, I decided to move out to get my own place. This was the best decision I made over those last 5 years. I got my own place (which I ended up hating) broke up with my best friend, dated a guy that was the worst guy I dated yet, and basically self destructed in the privacy of my own apartment. After all this was done, I slowly opened up to people outside my comfort zone. And I mean SLOOOOWLY. But, I met a woman who inspired me to take a chance I'd been talking about for years. And I did. I moved out of my apt into my mom's house, commuted and housesat for 7 months, went to Costa Rica for two, came back my old self and decided I was ok.

3 months later. My life begins to resemble the one that was falling apart. My just paid off car breaks down and causes me $1200 worth of repairs for which I had to get a credit card even though I'd also just paid off all that debt as well. My dad is sick, I've changed my plan for leaving the country again and decided after a long talk with brother dearest that I needed to just pick something and stick with it for awhile. So, I decided to choose Seattle. I'm sticking with Seattle for awhile.

On my way to pick up my now fixed Jeep, I am talking to a co-worker on the way up the escalator to her car where we will go drop me off at my Jeep. As I step on the escalator, I see at the top of the stairs a really good looking guy. Mental note.. need to check him out once he gets closer. As I'm telling my story to my co-worker, I look as the guy is right in eye view to give him a little smile, and when I do, I do a second take and realize its Doland! We have about a 20 second exchange of HEY! How are you?!?!?! Where are you now? Do you work here? and then I get to the top of the escalator (where I should have gone down to follow him but didn't) and he gets to the bottom, and we both sort of shrug and keep going. I tell my co-worker who he is and she says "You know, he's one of those guys that gets better looking with age, and they are hard to find. You should try and find him."

Which brings me full circle to that group I hung out with when my self esteem was so low. Do I contact them to see if I can find him? Do I try and find him on my own? Do I ride up and down the escalator for weeks to see if he shows up again?

I decided to give it one try. After three days of deliberation, I emailed two of the guys from the group, and got nowhere. So, I gave up. And I tried to pursue the shy guy who was showing no signs of interest, but was at least keeping me distracted. Then, after a bad day I swore off men.

Thursday June 28, 2007. 10:00pm. "I'm done. I'm totally done with guys. I will never understand them, and I'm done trying." And this time I really meant it.

Thursday June 28th, 2007. 11:00pm. The Red Door. Seattle, WA.
Here I sit with my friend Shelley who has helped keep me sane, who I am increasingly becoming irritated with because we are having a misunderstanding. I am in a bad mood. And I look at her and say "I'm leaving after I finish this beer. I don't need to be in public, I'm just in a bad mood." Then, as she's talking to me, I watch as this guy walks up the ramp. Fake tan, buff arms in a sleeveless softball jersey, swagger when he walks. "Well, at least I can entertain myself watching THAT guy..." I think to myself. So, as he walks up to the bar, I recognize the back of the guy he's with...could it be? NO... NO Waaaaaay. I'm not listening anymore to what Shelley is saying... and I blurt out

OMG! Shelley I think that's Doland!
Who?
Doland! You know the guy from the escalator story!
Well, go talk to him then.
I can't, I'm not for sure it's him.
Well, go over and see!
I'll just wait until he...

and then Doland turns around and looks at me. We spend the next 2.5 hours talking and catching up as "Gold's Gym" guy leaves, Shelley leaves, the rest of the world leaves... and we just keep talking. Until 2am.

And we just keep hanging out. And I just keep smiling.

*some names have been changed to protect those not used to blogging.

Public Service Announcement

This weekend I attempted the impossible; to disappear from life and get a grip. The last few weeks have been slightly intense and I needed a break. It didn't work, and the reason is because I can't completely turn off.



For those of you who haven't heard yet, my father is very sick. He has liver failure which causes all kinds of problems and he sometimes ends up in the hospital due to high ammonia levels in his brain which cause him to be 'out of it' to the point where he gets very confused and will call his new wife by his mother's name. Not a good thing.



I haven't blogged about this yet. Mostly because it's very personal, but also because isn't just my life, it is affecting everyone's lives around him, and most importantly it is really my dad's life I'm talking about. I feel weird about putting this all out there because of how others may 'read into' what I'm saying or that they might use some of this against me later on, but I feel like this is my way of getting things out there, and this will serve as my public service message.



I watch a lot of garbage tv when I need to decompress. Usually there is a hot guy on the show that just makes me happy to think there is someone out there like that (regardless of whether he is real or not). Numbers is a show I like to watch for two reasons: there is Don, the troubled soul FBI agent who is hot, and his nerdy mathemetician brother Charlie who is just geeky enough to be cute and quirky and you learn things from him. The episode I was watching, ironically, was about organ transplants and the black market sale of organs to donors. The episode focused on kidney transplants, but it basically served a purpose: to get the word out about organ donation.



My dad just got confirmed to be on the waiting list for a new liver, which is GREAT news. The other side to this great news is the waiting. The weird sensation of praying (or thinking/ wishing really hard) for a new liver to come up which will match all the categories of my dad. This basically means I'm hoping someone dies. This is a strange feeling. Knowing I am waiting for someone to die so my dad can live, and knowing that everyone that does die is not an organ donor or a match.



One of the recent times I was up at my dad's house, my grandmother announced to me "12 people died this week in Seattle. " My initial reaction was "holy lord, she's counting people's deaths!" and then I realized, every one of those people that died was a possibility for a new liver, and each person that didn't have the same characteristics reduced that possibility, along with the reduction by people who aren't organ donors.

So, here is my public service announcement. Be an organ donor. Help a family. Save a life.

Turning 30 (part 2 -- or what I can learn from)

I've spent a couple days recounting things that I did in my 20's that didn't necessarily work. I'll share these dating dont's with you now:

1. Just because he's telling you how much he loves you, if he's not acting like it. He doesn't.
2. Do not accept dates from men who kiss you after meeting you 10 minutes prior. This will end badly.
3. Do not date a drummer. (While they may be the backbone of a band...this does not mean they have a backbone.)
4. Do not date people named Jason. (This one is more for me than the rest of the population, but I have yet to meet a Jason I like.)
5. Do not make excuses for a guy. He's completely capable of making his own, and its better to listen to what he comes up with for later recounting with your friends. He said WHAT?!
6. Do not continue a date if when arriving at the restaurant your date has already had a meal and you are only 10 minutes late.
7. Do not expect that when a guy asks you out, picks the place for drinks, and asks you to stay for dinner, that he will also pay for this outing.
8. Do not count out the shy guy. He's probably better than the loud one.
9. Do not expect that letting a guy down easy is the best way. Sometimes you need to tell them that their 'Angel' has no interest whatsoever. Do not do this if you fear for your life. Tell them you are moving away, and when they tell you they will come with you... at this point you should change your number.
10. Do not 'date' a neighbor.
11. Do not think that because your high school boyfriend was simple and romantic then, that he will be now. Or that he will be single.
12. Do not continue to date someone who on your first date says "well, its not like I came here expecting to date you for 5 years." This guy will continue to be a jackass.
13. Do not expect that cute snowboarder/surfer guy who you have great wicked banter with via email will turn out to be the guy you expect when you finally meet him. He will be socially stunted. You should know this already from your other friends who are also snowboarder/surfer types (whom you are great friends with, but who ... lets face it ... are more used to being around guys than girls.)

Turning 30 (part 1)

There is so much hype about turning 30. Its a pretty big birthday. You are no longer in your twenties, but you aren't quite in your thirties; you're just thirty. Apparently, when you are 30, you should magically have all your shit together, be secure in your career of choice, have a significant other with a prospect of either marriage or children, have already or be in the process of buying a house/condo, and be on the road to the height of the American Dream.

Because I am not happy in my job, have no significant other or even a prospect of a significant other which means there is no marriage or children on my horizon, and I don't even have my own apartment at this point (but I do own those tubs outright). I'm about as far from the American Dream as you can get.

But here's what I do have. I have a fabulous family who, when I was in Costa Rica getting robbed, help keep me sane and alive and able to continue my trip to end it with good memories rather than the memory of being stranded in a surfers paradise with no money, no credit cards, no books, no journal, and unable to pay back a complete stranger who gave me $20 to last me a week.

I have great and amazing friends. Some whom I've known for over a decade; most of whom I've known for less than 3 years. People who have turned out to be the strong influences I needed to get me over the end of the crap that happens in your twenties when you are still figuring it all out, taking huge leaps of faith and crashing and burning because it wasn't the right ledge to leap off, who will pick you up off the floor and keep reminding you not only that you are, but WHY you are still "enough."

I also, now, have knowledge and faith in myself. I have the right reasons to say no, the strength to stick up for myself, and the ability to just let people walk out of my life if that's what they choose to do. It no longer crushes me to accept that people will think what they want about me: if they don't like me.... eff 'um. And when those that have walked out walk back in expecting me to be the same naive girl who will let them walk all over me once more just to make them feel better about themselves.. well, all I can say is "you had your chance and you blew it."

My favorite part about turning 30 was the women who upon finding out would say "welcome to the club. It only gets better," and listening to the people who had a hard time turning 30 say things like "it all goes downhill from here" and thinking to myself... "not for me!"

It was also fun to (after a crazy weekend of celebrating the last hours of my twenties) to wake up Monday morning and say "I did that crap when I was in my twenties!"

So, Here's to 30. Bring it!

Online Dating v. Just Living

I'm single. I've almost always been single. That's not to say I haven't dated men, but I definitely don't feel like I've had many quality dates. None of this is news: what is news, is that it is that time of year again. Weddings, BBQs, outdoor gatherings, camping trips, sailing... you name it, its happening up here. I love Seattle in the summer! There are almost so many things to do its hard to pick which one! The only problem I have with this is: I'm always the 3rd, 5th, 7th, or 121st wheel. Ok, I don't have 60 couple friends... but if I did, I'd be the token single girl.

Most people will say things like, but you could meet someone at the (insert event here), which is entirely possible. I very well might spend time talking to someone at a bar, BBQ, wedding, concert, or friends house party, give them my number, and never hear from them again.

This is the scenario that most fits my life.

Well, why not match.com?

I understand that people have met, had great dates and even gotten married through match.com, perfectmatch.com, eharmony... you get the picture. Even my 85 year old grandfather found something called catholicsingles.com and sent me an instant message one day to say "Someone is looking for you on catholicsingles.com!" -- and when I laughed he said: "You don't have much time left for that wedding to invite me to! I know he's right, after all I'm turning 30 in 23 days. That said, I'm nowhere NEAR marriage/settling down (makes me hold my breath just thinking about it), but that doesn't mean I don't want to find someone that fits my life. We'll get to that later.

I had a friend I hung out with in college, who - when I got down in the dumps about being single- would tell me things like: "you are so much better than these guys. They don't deserve you" and "if you make it to 30, have never been married, have no kids, and a good job -- guys will be lining up to date you." The latter statement I kept running over in my head when a relationship went wrong, or if another friend found her guy, or another guy friend found his wife: Well, I guess I'm just that much closer to being that great 30 year old woman! What Matt didn't tell me about that was that the men I would have to pick from would be a mix of workaholics, divorcees with children, and overgrown men reliving their college years night after night. I mean, I love going out and having a great time like the next person, but come on!

Don't get me wrong, that's not all of them. This weekend I took a look at match.com to see what I have to pick from. I found a handful of guys that I would be interested in. Most of them are the same men I find in my daily life to be attractive: outdoorsy, active, smart, creative, great smile. In fact, some of them I've actually SEEN and MET in real life. And I was attracted to them then. Why didn't they talk to me then? Why didn't we have a connection at that point? Why wait until I'm sitting in front of them with some diatribe about who my perfect man is, and why they should date me?

What I really want to happen is this:

text message alert:
Hey Katie, we're going to happy hour at _____. Come down and meet up!
my reply:
Sweet! See you there!
Hang out with some friends, meet a guy that I think is fun/funny/charming/good looking, give him my number, he calls (with or without the two day rule - I respect that) and says hey do you want to ______ today (tomorrow--Thursday, whatever)? I accept, we go to the movies, to a show, hiking, get a coffee and walk around and talk... easy right?!?! Not really.

The problem I'm finding, and I found a lot of it in those profiles (not only on match.com, but also on The Stranger's personals, Lovelab) was something that went like this: I've got a great life, and she should too. I want a woman who will be OK by herself on the weekends. I get that. I really do. I barely have time to juggle all my responsibilities with my social life. But come on! What's the trouble with being excited about someone new?

I think our world has become a little too made for order. You can find so many things that are personalized to our own requirements, that will be ready in an hour, or that will come in a color that is specifically matched to your mood. People don't come that way. People come with a life already, sometimes its packed with friends, sometimes its an activity, sometimes its work that keeps them busy. We also have access to a lot of activities here: in one day you could be out on the water, up in the mountains, go shopping for a new outfit and have dinner in the city! Its fabulous! But with our lives so packed full of activities, is there room for someone who's life mimics yours? And if you are doing the same things with the same people all the time, will you really run into someone different?


I have relatives that have had success through these online dating services. I have even gone so far as to look on them because like Dr. Phil says "Its okay to look." -- but you know what conclusion I've come to ... this just isn't going to work for me.

"Give it a chance!" you say. Well, here's the deal. I've looked. I've even posted an ad online -- and yes! Left it there for at least 2 weeks. Here's what happened.

I had 6 guys 'flirt' with me and two actually emailed me. I responded to the guys who emailed me, emailed another three, (none of them responded). And eventually carried on an email correspondence with one for a couple weeks. He was promising. Liked music, had a blog that he and his friends shared, had a job, and was really funny.

I got really busy with work, then with commuting and getting ready to leave the country, so when I had the time to email him again, it had been a week or so. He didn't respond. Oh well -- his loss. But seriously. I played it cool, I have my life, things I need to attend to, but I get a little too busy for even me sometimes. Maybe my online ad should read like this:

Quirky 30 year old seeking friend. Someone who wants to hang out with me and not be afraid of any of the following:

-phone calls at 2:30 Friday afternoon saying - lets go on a road trip this weekend! (Where? WHO CARES!!! Wherever... uh ROAD TRIP!)
-email saying: remember that band I was talking about: they are playing tonight, wanna go?
-text message saying "I'm with some friends at happy hour, come down!"

Sound too good to be true? Add on the fact that if I like you, and I probably do seeing as how I'm contacting you so much, I'll most likely want to actually spend time with you because you're fun, witty, funny, smart, up for anything, and I must think you're pretty cute!

Caveat: I'm a lot to handle. I get excited. I get happy. I laugh: loudly. I have a multitude of different friends I hang out with, and they may or may not be your cup of tea. I tell the truth...and sometimes I don't like to. But if I lie, I'll say that. "shoot, I just lied." I'm quirky. I like things that are different and out of the ordinary. I like people who are creative, smart, and have opinions. People who converse -- about things more than sports stats, cause even though I like to go to sporting events -- I don't keep track. Unless I'm trying to impress you, then I might do some research.

I wish that I could find the perfect guy -- for me. The one who isn't afraid to hang out with a girl more than once a week, because he's not thinking about how she'll take things: he's not thinking about it at all. All he knows is that he's having fun, and she's fun to be around, and if it happens that they end up becoming more, great! Someone that knows women are to be respected, and that if he doesn't want her to get the wrong idea, he won't act inappropriately as to put that idea out there. That while he has his life where he wants it, if he wants to meet someone he might need to give up one of those 4 weekend trips per month with 'the crew'(which usually is a mix of men AND women) to fit her in -- because he thinks hanging out with her is just as fun as anything he does with his friends-- its just filled with flirting instead. And at some point he may even invite her along with his friends because she would really get along with them. Don't forget about his attitude: confident, funny, smart, witty, active... and his style: flip flops, some longer(not long hair, but just a little past needing a hair cut) locks, and a good pair of jeans paired with a beanie or a baseball hat. I'll be a happy girl.

So, I guess my old fashioned plan will just have to work. Be me. Smile at boys. Have fun in life. Eventually someone I find irresistible will find me irresistible. Until then, if you know someone that fits my perfect man requirements: send him my way.

Oh yeah: here's the pic I'd use in my personal ad

Hand Motions

Its been a long time since I've gone out on a Thursday, let alone gone out just to hang out with people I didn't know very well. It all started out so innocently... who knew it would bring back so many memories?

Kady and I went to the M's game, and since the attendance was so poor, and no one in our section was even talking let along cheering... we decided to get up and walk around. We stumbled upon an area where apparently you can get your picture taken w/ the Mariners Moose... but while the Moose is out the Kady/Katie's will play! So, we did a mini photo shoot in that area before joining Events and Adventures over there in the Center Field area.

Its not really Events and Adventures, but it may as well be. It was like walking into a mixer. Or a meatlocker. Promplty made up our 'bar names' for the night, and of course the first time I got to use mine I forgot and told him my real name. But, all I really cared about was the relief pitcher beyond the chain link fence about 50 yards away: of course you'd have to move Kady out of the way before you could get to him... I think she was even more interested.

After our run in with the meat market section of the M's game, I decided that I was ready to flirt. So I tried to find out if Bingo was happening so I could see if I could 'run into' Adam. And I did... and we all went KARAOKING!!!!

Adam picked out a song for me to sing which just happened to be a very popular song from my, and I'm sure every other girl's youth within the past few years. My old roommie Megan and I even made up hand gestures one day on a trip into Spokane. God I miss that girl. Good times.

There is a lot to be said in this story, but I just really wanted to relive the moment when I blew the crowd away with my amazing singing. Everyone may have been drinking...but I loved the attention I got anyway. That was enough of an ego boost for me for a day or so.

Now, I'll be singing along to the radio in my car on my way to Kirkland for the Wine BBQ at Shana's... I'm sure I'll have more to talk about later on. :)

Friday the 13th

Very soon people will be checking in daily to see what I have to say, so I need to keep my posts up to a daily if not twice a week in order to appease the masses. So, here's a try at that.

Friday the 13th is observed by many to be a day of bad luck. Though there is no exact origin or reason for seeing Friday the 13th as being necessarily bad, millions of people have superstitions about doing anything on Friday the 13th for fear of bad things happening. There are examples of bad things happening on Fridays throughout history, such as Eve giving Adam the famous apple on a Friday, that the Last Supper occured on a Friday, as well as the Crucifixion and the Great Flood.

According to Wikipedia, an estimated $800 to $900 million dollars is lost in business because people will not fly or do regular business on this day.

I have my own superstitions about Friday the 13th. I always meet guys on Friday the 13th. It may have something to do with me LOVING Friday the 13th, so of course I'm totally happy and carefree on this day, but no matter. I look forward to Friday the 13th.

So, here's to positive thinking, superstitions and anything else you'd like to have. Wish me luck. I'm off to Mexico for Margs.

New Horizons

After being back in the real world for a little over a month, I realize things aren't as bad as they were before I left. My job is still unrewarding, sterile, and full of unneccessary drama; but it is not killing me like it was before. I have a new head on my shoulders and the ability to pick and choose what will and can make my life fall apart at any given moment.

I have a direction I want to travel and am working on the way to do that. I'm building my armor for negative comments, unbelievers, and jealous monsters alike, as well as my web for those inspirational moments, the deep lasting conversations, quietly positive motivators, and the people in the shadows who gain nothing, but sincerely await the moment you reach your goal if only to celebrate with you that moment in time.

I've gained a new belief in myself that was lost long ago. Watch out world!

Ok... on to new and very important topics.

Every morning on my way into work I have great thoughts that I could write about for many minutes. Everyday when I get to my desk they immediately erase themselves from memory and I am left to attempt to dredge these visions/thoughts from my mind. Sometimes it works; most times it does not.

After I've decided to move on from dwelling on the misery of no thoughts (this desk must take most of my creativity) I turn to my "Bad Girls Daily Desk Calendar 2007" so I can see what words of wisdom I have for the day. Most days the calendar warrants a chuckle from the "10 Best Uses for Pantyliners" or "Personal Dating Commandments" but my favorite one so far has been February 15, 2007.

Thursday, February 15

Bad Girl Party Pointer
Score a Free Drink Tonight!

Order your drink as usual, then act completely surprised and quite flustered when you open your wallet and find nothing but foreign currency. Then act really embarrassed and apologetic and loudly sputter something like, "Silly me! I've been so busy unpacking, I've forgotten to change my euros/yen/NYC subway tokens." Then gaze around the bar like a doe until some gallant soul offers to pay for your drink. Be prepared to chat him or her up with your exciting tales from abroad. If you're a skilled raconteur, you'll be drinking for free for the rest of the night.

Why I like this... I just got back from Costa Rica, and until about a week ago, still looked sun kissed. I might have actually been able to pull this off if I lived somewhere that people were actually friendly enough to just chat up the person next to them with no hidden agenda, but unfortunately, I reside in Seattle. If, if someone were paying attention to the girl at the bar during happy hour who forgot her wallet, I'm not sure they would be outgoing enough to help her out, and if they were, you have to be careful about making sure they aren't a serial killer since we breed them here. AND, since its so cold here, in order to show off my lovely tan I'd have to brave the cold wind and rain (forget about doing my hair) in order to go out to a bar where they still have the ac on, so a girl has to keep her coat on inside anyway.

Needless to say, I can't wait for summer. For an open air patio and a SLIGHT (please!! slight only.. not a steady blowing) wind. Where Seattleites congregate on Fridays at 3 in order to get a table outside, because if its a nice day, you better take advantage. Or, if you are even luckier, you have a friend with a boat, who wants to take it out for a spin. Summer here is magical. Seattle becomes a different place, all 560,000 people are outside engaged in one activity or another, soaking up that essential Vitamin D that escapes us about 5 months of the year. I welcome summer with open arms, flashy sunglasses, and great looking flip flops.